Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
