Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
