think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
this must be what syphilis tastes like
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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