You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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