it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
