Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
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