Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize