Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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