doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Randomize
