So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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