I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
