Christians are straight up FREAKS
I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize