It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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