i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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