Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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