The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
