Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
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