The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
You need Xanax blowdarts
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
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