so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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