it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
You had me at "let me see your balls"
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
