My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Randomize
