me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
