Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize
