i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you donโt have to recycle anymore ๐๐
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize