I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
