Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
