meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
i just made my gag reflex go away.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
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