I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
