so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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