Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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