Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Just invented taco cereal.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
