If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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