now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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