shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
I'm sobbing to NWA
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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