my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
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