More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
