I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
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