This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
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