and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
