It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Randomize
