Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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