Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize