that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
