I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize