Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
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