the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
