okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
i just sent this text using only my big toe
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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