Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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