Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Randomize
