If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
