Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize
