friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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